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Christmas 1999

SPECIAL HANDLING PLEASE

I was handed a package the other day.
It was wrapped securely to be mailed away.
Attached to the outside as plain as could be
Was a simple note for all to see.

Please rush through the holiday season;
Too painful to open for any reason.
Contained within, find one broken heart-
Fragile, broken, falling apart.

Tried to go shopping the other day;
The hype of the season blew me away.

Sat down to write cards,
That was insane.
Couldn't find the list
Or think of my name.

People say, "Come over,
be of good cheer."
"Celebrate the holidays,
Prepare a New Year."

But my grief overwhelms me
Like waves in the sea.
Can they cope with my crying,
an unsettled me?

I don't have any holiday cheer.
Decorations, traditions, big family meal
I can't do this year.
Do you know how I feel?

Guilty and frustrated!
I've let everyone down!
Our holiday celebrations
used to be the best in town.

So just ship me away
Address unknown
When my grief is better
I might fly home.

author
Mary J. Pinkava

Feb 12, 1973-May 12, 1998

Dearest Jamie, This is our second Christmas without
you and that seems totally impossible. You are still so
much here with us. Christmas will never be the same
without you. I treasure the memories of each Christmas
with you. It's so hard to want to celebrate the season
now that you are gone. On that morning, I still want
to call you and hear your grumpy "just woke up" voice.
I want to see you walk in the door, with your Santa hat
and your bag of gifts, with your face unshaven, because
you were in such a hurry to get here. *smile* Daddy and
Michael enjoyed Christmas, but they didn't go all out
like you and I did. We never quite got the "kid" out of
us, did we? I miss you making those huge ham
sandwiches, and me telling you that you would never
be able to eat all that. You swore everytime that you
could, but you couldn't. I miss you wanting to put
the "tacky" plastic Santa in your front yard. I miss
riding by your house and seeing the decorations.
I miss the phone calls asking, "What do Daddy and
Michael want for Christmas? What do YOU want
for Christmas?" You had just started to add to my
Santa collection. The only one you gave me is my
special treasure. With your help, I hope to put it out
this year, along with the other decorations. I have felt
you lately sending me Peace. Letting me know that
you want me to go on celebrating Christmas. You
loved it so! Michael got married on the 13th of
November, as you know, you were there. Things are
changing and it's hard not having you here to share
in the changes. They are talking of having children
soon. I wish...Oh I Wish......
We love you Jamie. You will always be a part of
everything we do.
Merry Christmas, Sweetheart!

~Christmas Without You~

It's going to be a sad Christmas this year
without your laughter & without your cheer.
I'll miss the sight of you with your Santa's hat,
and the smile you shared from where you sat.

I'll think about all the Christmas's in the past,
and hold to the memories that slipped so fast.
For they're all I have left to remember,
on this sad Christmas morning in December.

I'll think about you and cherish each thought...
and think of your smile & the happiness it brought.
And as I listen to the church bells ring,
your voice will echo as the choirs sing.

I can never tell you, my love, how sad it will be
to spend Christmas without you here with me.
I just wish you'd touch my heart in such a way,
that I could live through the pain of Christmas day.

And, help me to remember that your love
is still sent to me from the Heavens above.
And although you won't decorate my Christmas tree,
Your spirit will light the lights for me to see.

Oh, I'll hear your voice in each Christmas song.
I'll see your face in each child that comes along.
And although my heart will be broken and torn...
I'll know you're with Jesus on this Christmas morn.

No, Christmas won't be the same without your smiling face
but I'll know you're in a much better place.
I'll think of my precious child in everything I do...
Cause, it just won't be "Christmas Without You!"

Written by Kaye Des'Ormeaux
November 8, 1998
Dedicated to Karen in memory of Jamie
All rights reserved.

It's Christmas Time Again

The world is filled with light and song
That fill us with pain, now that you're gone.
People rushing, running to and fro.
Another year gone, Dear Lord where'd it go?

We had a tree to place the presents we gave.
Now the Christmas Tree adorns your new grave.
Each shiny ornament and twinkling light,
Reminds us of how much we lost that night.

As the world celebrates the birth of Christ,
We are thankful for His gift of eternal life.
Without His promise of a Heavenly home,
We'd not have a reason to keep going on.

Maybe at some point in the coming years,
Once again Christmas will have no tears.
The Holidays, once happy, fill us with dread.
It's hard to believe in any happiness ahead.

Our hearts are filled with emptiness and pain,
Christmas cards sent, with our tears are stained.
How can we wish others for their dreams to come true,
When our dream won't happen, our wish is for YOU.

Karen McCombs
For Jamie
Dec. 19, 1999
All rights reserved

Dec. 11, 1996-Nov. 22, 1997

Dearest Ashley, Bless you, baby girl. You never got
to enjoy one Christmas here on earth. We, nor your daddy,
ever got to see your shining eyes on Christmas morning.
We never got to tell you about Jesus and the meaning of
Christmas. We never got to buy you presents and see you
get so excited about Santa. Knowing your daddy, you
would have been one happy little girl on Christmas
morning! *smile* But you have the best Christmas of
all now. You have your daddy and you both celebrate
the birth of Christ with Him in person, in Heaven.
Someday, when it's time for us to come home, we will
finally get to hold you and give you the hugs and kisses
we're saving for you. Until then, we keep a special
place in our hearts and lives, just for you.
We Love you, Ashley.
Merry Christmas, Baby Girl!

Christmas in Heaven

We're wondering what Christmas in Heaven is like
As we grieve alone and pray,
Longing for one who has gone before
To spend Christmas in Heaven today.

And so in our dreams we wander far
From the scenes and sounds of earth
`Til we catch the strains of the Heavenly choir
As they sing of the Christ Childs birth.

The Angels we envision there
As they join in the festal gay
And there amid the throng is our Loved One
Spending Christmas in Heaven today.

There's joy in the faith that teaches
When our lifes work is done
Of a place in Heaven awaiting
And the crown we worked for is won.

In our grief may we learn well the lesson
So to work and suffer and pray
As to merit the joys of our loved one
And to spend Christmas together some day.

A special gift from Helen.
Click on card to visit her lovely site

Visit Katia's beautiful site

Visit Santa's Angels

A Gift from Deb and her angel Cole. Thank you Deb.

Another Christmas gift from Deb. Thank you!

A Christmas gift from Sonya. Thank you Sonya.

A gift from a member of MMIAS

In Memory of all our angels.

Christmas Page 2